You see what I did there? I hoodwinked you into thinking that this is a post to do with the election, but it is not. What it really is is a bit of admin really – which is the kiss of death to any sentence – and I am telling you something that you have probably figured out for yourself.

First things first: I have changed my theme. Let me give you all a moment to freshen up. Yes, I have changed my look and got a new ‘header’ as they say in the CSS world. I don’t know about you but I was getting right sick of the grassy theme I had. Made me look like a rawfood deli.

Secondly, I have been shortlisted for Funniest Blog of the Year in the MAD Awards. Which is ironic as this post is shaping up to be the unfunniest post I have written in a while. The bottom line is that I need my readers to vote for me again. I can feel your apathy, and I understand it, but if you can be bothered then cast a vote in my direction as I could manage to snag myself some John Lewis vouchers, earn tremendous kudos and maybe free entry into the Dytopian daymare that is Butlins (I think it is fair to say that I have forever burnt my bridges with Butlins…).

lastly, the election. I’m not voting because I just couldn’t organise the postal vote in time and even if I did there is not a space on the form for ‘none of the above.’ Gordon Brown just looks like he is in the wrong job; he should be in a cubicle in a faceless office somewhere analysing risk factors of using chairlifts. David Cameron is not actually real. And can anyone seriously imagine Nick Clegg arguing over troop numbers with President Obama? You’re havin’ a laugh.

So, don’t bother with them lot – vote for me!


18 thoughts on “Vote!

  1. Vote on the way, and I could save you the hassle of having to dye your suits (you did talk about dying your suits at one point, didn’t you?). How big are you? Son #2 has a red poncho that might just do the job, and you’re welcome to borrow it. Nice new header, by the way. Amazing how you can make a fondue set look anarchic.

    1. If I wore a red poncho I will have officially tipped over into the realm of nutter…not as if there is far to tip. Thanks for the vote, I’ll buy you a pint of raspberry leaf tea.

  2. If it was down to Butlins I reckon you’d be the outright winner, just for the peverse pleasure of seeing you have to get your groove on with the Red Coats for a week.

    Love the new look too.

    1. I have resisted the urge to reply with a furniture based gag mainly because the only ones I could think up were: ‘sure, next to the gin…’ or ‘…hiding seek becomes too easy if you tell me where you’re hiding.’

      But – thank you – and you can be in my cabinet. You can be Defence and your first job is to raid Luxembourg.

  3. ha ha I know, Gordon looks like he’d like to be anywhere else than running the country. He should be a grey civil servant in a cubicle, yes, maybe Deputy Assistant Manager for the Distribution of Traffic Cones! I couldn’t organise a postal vote either (I am in USA) in fact since I got lost on the way to the hairdressers yesterday it is unlikely I could organise a piss up in a brewery.

    1. Your hair must be long if you got lost on the way to coiff-shop.

      The postal vote just got too complicated and then my kids started to fight (again) so I gave up…

  4. Good Morning Mr Shev

    I am commenting in my official capacity as, erm, MADs person. We’re trying to get in touch with some info about the finalists’ stages – could you drop me a quick email please?



  5. Can I just tell you how much you nailed this one?! The one time we had a Swiss family for dinner, they stayed until 1am, with their 6-year-old and their 3-year-old! We practically had to send formal written apologies to the neighbors, and it took us three days to recover. Trying to stick now to meeting on the playground, periodically re-reading Lord of the Flies to recall the general rules there.

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